ScarfBoy
by pastiche
Summary: Chuck Bass becomes Scarf-Boy and battles the rays of confusion hurled at him by his evil nemesis Alex. Who flirtaciously nicknamed him and gave him his status of side-kick. rating may change in case Chuck manages to get her into bed.
1. What are you carrying?

A/N: My sincerest apologies to true GG fans. To be entirely honest I've only seen 1 and ½ episodes of GG, so basically none of what I write will be related to actual episodes in anyway. I'm only writing this fic because I find Chuck Bass to be intriguing and I hope to capture his character in my fic. So you have my condolences and permission for angry reviews if I butcher any of the following : Chuck Bass as a character, GG as an idea, other characters in GG, and New York as a city. Though I might follow episodes at one point or another it's doubtful. Also I'd like you to realize that this was a random idea and may be a fleeting one and if met with total angry criticism I promise to start again or become a fan of something else.

And my deepest apologies to the few people who've already read this but the name change was a must.

What Are you Carrying?

Chuck sighed as he moseyed around the New York streets. Bored to pieces. Why he was up before noon in the middle of summer vacation was a mystery to even the most ancient gods. Perhaps it could be because he hadn't even made it home yet from the party last night. He might be over tired, a tad cranky and still sort of drunk but what was the point of going home now. He would just have to get up anyways.

"Sorry dude." said a voice… a girlish voice.

Chuck turned to see a girl walking away juggling a stack of rolled papers and a few things that appeared to be overly large thin briefcases. He watched as she manoeuvred her way into a doorway, disappearing from view. He walked over to where she had vanished and discovered a small used book store. A used book store? Chuck wondered where in New York he was, certainly not upper east side. He quickly forgot his ponderings as he stepped inside and saw the girl again, but this time with a better view. She wasn't thin, more fit, her legs looked perfect in the black short shorts that blended with her led-zeppelin shirt and she had long dark brown curls that framed her thin face. Awe how cute she looked like the shy type, he loved the shy type.

Her belongings were dumped on the front counter, leaving her hands free as she roamed the bookshelves. He walked up to her, a winning smile perfectly in place.

"Hello." He said averting her attention from the literature.

"Can I help you?" she asked tensely .

"You ran into to me right?"

"Did I hurt you or something?"

"No, not at all I just wanted to apologize for getting in your way. And maybe I could buy

You a coffee?"

"Sorry I'm not interested."

"Oh come on. It's the least I can do."

"How is it the least you can do, I walked into you…"She said raising an eyebrow.

"Well then it's the least you could do."

"The least I can do… is let you buy me a coffee?" the poor girl was dreadfully confused.

"Exactly" Chuck said, thinking he was getting what he wanted.

"What if I'm a mean person and don't want to do the least that I could do?"

"Do you not like coffee?" Chuck asked startled by yet another refusal.

"I adore coffee, just not snobby rich boys still tipsy from the previous night."

"Hey hun I am not tipsy." he said leaning against the bookcase for balance.

"Stand up straight then." she challenged him.

"Tell me your name." he shpt back.

"Alex" she turned and walked back up to the counter at a fast pace with the book she had managed to choose during their conversation.

Chuck made to follow and stumbled as he let go of the bookcase. Alex heard and smirked, without turning around to face him she said clearly and with a musical tone in her voice, "I told you so."

Chuck caught up as she paid for the book. "Why don't you let me help carry your things, then you won't have to risk running into any more snobby rich boys."

Alex looked him up and down like she was wondering if he'd wreck everything he touched.

"I'm not that clumsy," he assured her, "not a single one, of whatever this stuff is, will touch pavement."

"Alright," she agreed, it was really hard to carry it all on her own, "but you really need some coffee."

Chuck smirked, "Oh fine then, if you must insist."

Alex rolled her eyes and gathered half of her burden. Chuck grabbed the other half and followed her out the door.

They hadn't walked long when she walked into another doorway, this one surrounded by patio chairs. Chuck dutifully followed. His eyes opened wide in slight bewilderment and shock.

They had walked into a small lime green café with purple trims and counter. There was various sitting areas made up of miss-matched couches and chairs.

"This isn't star bucks" he mumbled.

"Your skills of observation are really astounding." Alex said laughing sarcastically.

She dumped her stuff on one of the tables in between two couches and motioned for him to put the rest there too. Walking up to the counter she turned to Chuck, "Is regular coffee ok or would you prefer a fancy latte?" she inquired.

"Regular coffee is fine." he said, in a slightly defensive tone. He sat down and looked around as Alex ordered the coffees. At first he thought it was just random paintings that had been collected but then he realized they were actually for sale, some of them weren't actually that bad.

"Here you go" Alex said, putting a cup of coffee in front of him, with a thermos of cream and a few packets of sugar.

"Thanks," Chuck said grateful for the coffee, he poured in some cream and dump in some sugar, then paused, " Why is the sugar brown?"

"It's organic and unrefined. Don't complain, it's good for you and it taste better." She leaned back into the couch and rested her heals on the coffee table. " May I enquire as to your name?"

"Chuck."

"Well Chuck, what's with the scarf?"

"Don't mock the scarf, this is my signature scarf."

"So you wear it all the time?"

"Everyday" he said with a proud smirk.

"Then forgive me but I must call you scarf-boy."

"What?"

"You don't sound very happy."

"Could it be because I'm not?"

"How can you not like scarf-boy? I love it."

"Well your not the one being called scarf-boy"

"It has a certain comic-book-side-kick ring to it." she said with a mischievous smirk.

"SIDE-KICK! Your calling me a side-kick? No if I had a comic book I would be the lead hero."

"But that would deny the logic of comic books as scarf-boy is only side-kick material. You can't kill arch enemy's with a scarf. You can only assist someone stronger."

"Comic book logic?" he asked tilting his head in a mocking gesture. "You're lucky I'm so tired."

"And why would that possibly be?"

"Because I'm too tired to punish you for your insults."

"Well than you can't be all that offended by them."

"Oh but I am. Your just lucky. You shouldn't hang out with me, I'm not an entirely honourable person."

"You realized I attempted that but you were dishonourably persistent."

"Was I now?"

"So it would seem." she rolled her eyes.


	2. Can you feel the bubbles?

**A/N **hope this is going well for your eyes. Let me know if I make mistakes with the spelling of names and such things. Also if you know a lot about GG maybe you could tell me the names of some clubs they go to?

Disclaimer: I only own the characters you've not seen in GG

Can you feel the bubbles?

"So why can't I be a villain?" Chuck asked with an eyebrow raised.

"hmmm?" Alex asked startled. They had been sitting in silence for awhile after her last comment and her mind had become occupied, reliving the last movie she had seen.

"I want to be a villain." he said again leaning forward and looking at her intensely.

"but you can't" she replied in a matter-of-fact voice. 

"Why not?" 

"You're a bit whiny aren't you?"

Chuck sat back on the couch, took in a deep breath and said calmly, "Why not?"

"Because your scarf-boy" her voice had a hint of a "duh" tone to it.

"So?"

"I explained this before. Killing an arch enemy with a scarf is just not amusing. There would be no gore. And killing with a scarf isn't scary enough to make you a villain. Maybe a villain's side-kick, you know where you get the materials ready for his evil experiments and such."

Chuck crossed his arms and glared at her. 

"Sorry love, but it's the truth. No temper will make you better than you are."

He directed his glare out the window, willing a witty remark to pop into his head. Unsuccessful he sighed and looked at the table where her stuff laid in a heap. 

"What is all that?" He asked. 

"Nothing" She muttered looking out the window.

"So you don't mind if I look at it? Good." 

Before she had a chance to say no he grabbed one of the rolled up pieces and opened it. 

Alex watched him as he held the drawing an arm's length away cocking his head to one side than the other. 

"What is it?" He seemed intrigued .

"If I could see it I might be better suited as to inform you." 

He turned the picture towards her. 

"It's a bloody teapot."

"Well that's what I thought too. I just didn't want to make that assumption and insult the sensitive artist in you." he was smirking, knowing that in pretending to not know what it was he had annoyed her greatly.

"Maybe you need to be denoted from side-kick"

"What's with you and the comic books?"

"You're my inspiration."

"Well to most women I'm most inspiring in the bedroom."

"I'm sure."

"Care for the experience."

"Not a bit."

"And why not?"

"Well I don't particularly enjoy bathing in acid."

"I'm not sure that's what it feels like."

"That's what it will take to get the feel off."

"Do I really affect you that much?" he asked in a smug manner.

"So do my allergies."

Chuck smiled and drank the remaining dregs of his coffee. Alex had finished hers awhile ago. She was stretching her arms above her head and arching her back, lengthening her spine. She sighed in satisfaction unaware of his eyes on her. 

Sitting back normally she became aware of his intense gaze and turned her head out the window. She never enjoyed being looked at.

"So where to now?" He asked as he continued to watch her. Enjoying her sudden shyness.

"I'm going home and your going on with your life." she continued staring out the window.

Some lady was walking her cat. It was an interesting affair. The cat either didn't appreciate the leash or thought of it as a great toy.

"You won't go on with your life once you get home?" he asked mockingly.

She only rolled her eyes.

"I didn't get to buy you a coffee yet though."

"We just had coffee." she said looking at him finally but with an exasperated look.

"But you paid." He replied tactfully

"It matters?"

"Absolutely." He grinned. 

"Well next time your in the neighbourhood give me a call." she said sarcastically

"Fine but next time I see you I'm buying you some sort of beverage. No matter what."

"Sure" 

She already had everything in her arms, ready to walk out the door.

"I'm going to hold you to it." he insisted. 

"uh-huh. See you around." she called as she walked out the door.

Chuck stood in the middle of the quaint coffee shop shaking his head. That was one odd girl. She was so resistant to his charms though that he hoped he would see her again when he was at the top of his wit and not half alive from partying all night. Instead of calling a limo like usual he hailed a taxi and had it take him home. He didn't want anyone knowing where he had ended up when he didn't know where he had ended up.

As he was riding in the taxi he felt his cell vibrating in his pocket. It was a text from Nate, wondering where he was and to meet him, Blair and Serena for drinks that night. He replied that he'd be there and asked what time. Seven was all Nate replied. Resting his head back against the seat his thoughts wandered again to the resistant little artist.

Alex couldn't help but jump for joy as she texted her friends Jane and Alice. Telling them her terrific news. The Clementine Gallery had agreed to exhibit her art in October. Her texts back announced a need for celebration at a fancy night club.

Chuck stepped into 13, the bar/lounge. The jazz funk music pumped intensely from the oversized speakers. He headed directly to the bar to meet the rest of the group and get a drink. Everyone soon arrived and Blair and Serena quickly dashed to the dance floor. 

"So where were you this morning?" Nate asked Chuck curiously, "I called your place but there was no answer. "

"I was out getting coffee."

"Out getting coffee?" Nate scoffed, "Why would you go out for coffee when you can have it made to order and delivered to your bedside?"

"Well you know I never made it home last night."

"So why didn't you go home and change and get coffee brought to your closet?"

"My dear naïve Nathaniel, you assume it was only me drinking coffee." Chuck replied with a shake of his head.

"Do I know her?"

"Highly doubtful"

"But Chuck, I know everyone. Courtesy of Blair."

"Yes but see I didn't even know her till I met her this morning."

"How'd you meet her? Did you whistle at her legs?"

"No actually the little vixen walked right into me."

"How do you manage to meet girls like this?" Nate asked in an admiring tone.

"By not being tied down to any particular one." Chuck said nodding in a knowing manner.

"Three shots of tequila and three beer please." 

Chuck's head whipped to the left as he followed the sound of the familiar voice. 

Sure enough there she was in a low cut red tank top that fell in semi-transparent layers around her body. She paired it with blue jeans. He shook his head, she could almost be high class.

"Excuse me Nathaniel, there is a matter I must address."

Walking up beside her he easily wrapped his arm around her waste and leaned against the counter. She looked at him in shock at his close proximity.

"I hardly think those drinks are organic." He said teasingly in her ear. He could feel her shiver.

"If alcohol was organic I don't believe it would have the same intoxicating effects." she replied leaning into him. 

"Are you slightly intoxicated already?" His tone mocking "Your much more friendlier than I remember."

"I haven't drank a drop, we just arrived. But I am in a very good mood. My good judgement has fleeted me for the night." 

"What causes such euphoria?" he asked playing with a curl that hung loosely down her back.

"A Gallery wants to show my teapot to the world." she responded with a grin.

"The world?" he repeated with mock amazement. "Surely you jest."

"Don't call me Shirley. Or have you forgotten my name already? So maybe not the world, but they'll display it. Which calls for celebration."

He chuckled. "You celebrate with tequila and beer? Why not champagne?" 

"I'm bubbly enough already can't you tell?"

Chuck laughed out loud. She was in fact almost jumping up and down.

"Well why doesn't your party join my party and we'll all celebrate together?" he asked her. He was interested in getting her in an even better mood to see if it could get her in his bed.

"Oh I don't know…" she trailed off as a two girls appeared beside them and on asked, 

"Lex, who's this?"

"Oh uhmmm Alice, Jane this is Chuck. Chuck this is Alice and Jane."

Chuck looked over the two girls as he shook their hands. Alice was a dirty blonde and her hair was straight, down to her waist. She wore a black halter dress. He like her legs. Jane was taller than Angie and Alice but not taller than himself, she had pretty black hair pinned up in a stylish fashion with chopsticks. He liked her top more than her legs. Her dress was dark blue.

"Nice to meet you" Jane said smiling. "Would you like to join us?"

"You really should," Alice jumped in, "I'm sure Lex would love it, tonight's a celebration for her." she smiled at Alex clearly she thought this was what she wanted.

"I would love too, if of course you don't mind my other friends joining us too."

"Of course not, we love meeting people." Jane assured him.

He smiled and kept his arm around Alex. She seemed slightly less bubbly and he feared she might run off if he didn't keep her occupied. Chuck led the group of girls over to where he had been standing with Nate, Blair and Serena had returned and were sipping drinks. 

"Awe little Chucky has made some friends." Serena called over the music. "How sweet." She turned to Blair, "It's like his first day of school all over again." she continued to coo.

"They grow up so fast." Blair replied, pretending to wipe tears from beneath her eyes.

"If the two of you are done…" Chuck asked with sarcasm. "I would like to introduce you to my new friends. This is Alex, Alice and Jane. These snobs are known as Nathaniel and Blair and mom here is Serena." 

There was a round of 'nice to meets you''s 

Blair turned to the girl chuck had on his arm, Alex, and noticed her outfit. 

"Do you were jeans to most nightclubs?" she asked, a laugh at the edge of her voice.

"I don't like dancing in dresses." Alex replied easily.

"Why's that." Blair persisted. 

"They require to much attention and carefulness."

"That's a really good idea." Serena cut in quickly.

Alex downed her shot and followed it with a swig of beer. Placing the empty glass on a passing tray. The bubbles were slowly dying. She didn't like it when people thought to highly of themselves. 

"Why don't we head upstairs and we can all get acquainted?" Nathaniel suggested. 

"Sure hunny." Blair was quick to agree grasping his arm.

They began making there way across the dance floor. Chuck kept his arm firmly around Lex's waist. Lex turned her head to give her friends an apologetic look, but they seemed extremely pleased with the situation. She sighed and turned to Chuck, 

"Maybe we should get some champagne."

**A/N **please review.


	3. Do you dance?

**A/N** Sorry about the short chapeter. it didn't seem so short on word document.

Chuck stood with a glass of champagne in his hand, peering over the balcony and watching his brunette dance with Serena. After a few glasses of champagne Alex seemed to get her bubbles back. She and the equally bubbly Serena hit it off and decided they should go and dance. Alex's friends were talking to two boys they'd met and seemed oblivious to their friends absence. He leaned against the railing content to just continue watching.

She had a way about dancing, hips moving steady with the rhythm but in odd patterns, and her arms floated around her in the air as she swayed.

Serena couldn't stop giggling. Blair and Nate were on a sofa whispering to each other.

Feeling that he wouldn't be bothered anytime soon he began to think about her erotic movements in other situations.

He must have slipped off into a longer daydream than he thought, for he focussed his eyes and found her leaning on the rail beside him, staring at him with a mischievous grin.

"Why are you smiling, and why does it give me the feeling that I need to run away."

"You were breathing rather heavily there," she replied her grin growing, "Are you feeling faint? Or could your mind have been occupied with something that requires heavy breathing? Such as riding a bicycle up a hill perhaps?"

"Why would I daydream about riding a bicycle?"

"Well then it must be my second guess then."

Chuck wondered how she managed to look so mischievous and enticing at the same time.

"And what would that guess be?"

"You were wondering what it would be like to participate in the dancing activities that this club offers. Instead of standing here all alone like a dork with your eyes glazed over."

"I was, was I?"

"Oh absolutely. And look your in luck. I will happily drag you down to the dance floor and force you to enjoy life."

"What would I do without you?" he asked with mockery.

"You'd die."

"Die?"

"Yes, lack of dancing kills the heart."

"I thought you were dancing with Serena?"

"I was but now she's dancing with that guy." she pointed to Serena dancing with a tall blonde.

"You don't like that guy?"

"He has an odd musk to him."

He raised his eyebrows causing her to giggle.

"So how intoxicated are you now?" he asked her mockingly.

"I still have full control of my motor skills." she stated proudly.

"Oh so you always dance that chaotically."

"Is there any other way?" she asked pretending to be shocked and appalled.

"Of course not what was I thinking."

"Well I can't blame you entirely for your ignorance, after all you're only a side-kick." her smirk caused him to roll his eyes.

"You should come over, I'll show you my cape." His tone was playfully suggestive.

"What did I tell you about my not being fond of acid baths." the lecture was playful.

"Hey I just wanted to show you my cape. God darling, get your mind out of the gutter."

She just smiled and continued watching the dancers. Then she leaned over and whispered in his ear,

"Do you think your friends would like your new nick-name?"

"You wouldn't dare."

"I dare to do all sorts of things. Why not this?"

"Well I'd have to punish you." Chuck tried to keep his tone matter-of-fact, keeping the worry out of his voice. He did not want to be called Scarf-Boy by all his friends and the entire school. He also knew he wouldn't be able to buy her out of the idea.

"By what means?"

"Well I could whip you."

She giggled. "I'm not sure it's entirely legal to whip human beings to inflict pain. Maybe if you had a time-machine."

He sighed and wrapped his arm around her waste, pulling her into his chest. Looking down at her he gave her a sad stern look, "You're breaking my heart doll."

"You know no one has actually called me doll before. I don't entirely despise it. And as for your heart we can always glue it back together." As she said the last bit she patted him consolingly on the chest.

"It's nice to know some one cares." Was his sarcastic reply.

"So back to my purpose for coming up here."

He looked at her with a confused look.

"Do you dance Scarf-Boy?"

"Only when forced."

"Then you must consider yourself forced." She grabbed his arm and dragged him down the stairs to the dance floor.

Chuck was a good dancer, he just preferred to watch. But he couldn't help himself when Lex started dancing. Beckoning him over. He wrapped his arms around her from behind, pulling her close to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck behind her and they swayed to the music, lost in another world for a bit. Chuck buried his face in her hair, it smelled deliciously of strawberries. Turning her around so she faced him he let one hand wander up and down her spine. Her knees grew weak and she leaned on him to keep from falling. Damned stiletto shoes.

"I think we should find somewhere to be alone." Chuck whispered to her, biting her earlobe.

"But I really love this song." she whispered back.

"But what I have in mind is even better than this song." he leaned forward to kiss her neck and she immediately pushed away from him. He looked surprised.

"You've become to sure of yourself Scarf-Boy" she said slyly before slipping into the crowd.

Lex had a talent to lose herself in crowds. Most of the time she stood out with her antics and clothing choices. But when she chose to she could blend in and hide. She was a little frustrated that Chuck thought she'd be that easy. Hadn't she taught him a thing this morning? Wondering if she should go back or disappear for the night she realized it was only ten o'clock and she wouldn't sleep for hours anyways. But what to do about Chuck. If she went back up there he might question her or hit on her again and if he put his hands on her like that again she might just go home with him. Overwhelmed with ponderings she decided to go to the bar and order a drink. See if it made things any clearer.

Chuck stood in the middle of the dance floor where Alex had left him. Still in shock from her disappearing act. She was very resistant, which unfortunately made her all the more appealing. There was more that appealed to him than just her being female though. She talked back to him and had him do things with out his permission. Most of all he enjoyed their conversations. Looking at his watch he decided that she wouldn't have left and would have to come upstairs at some point to retrieve her two friends. Figuring that when she did he could engage her in a conversation that would grant him her company for the remainder of the evening. Then he would be charming, drive her home and ask her to dinner. Dinner might be to boring, but she might enjoy his club.

a/n I really love those reviews, considering I only have one. thank-you Kayee143.


	4. A ride

A/N sorry for the lack of update but when I'm at my dad's house I have no computer access. I'll try to update as much this week as possible but there probably won't be anything for tomorrow night. Also I'll try to use my planning block to write. SO SORRY. Short chapter too I know but come on it's a fanfic.

Sitting on a sofa by himself Chuck waited for Alex to reappear. The damn woman was sure taking her time about it too. He'd switched his drink to scotch and was on his third when she launched herself down beside him on the sofa. Startling him.

"Scarfy you must help me with my dilemma!" She exclaimed grabbing his drink and taking a sip.

"You've managed to shorten my nickname?" he asked annoyed.

"Yes."

"Oh okay what do you need then."

Ignoring his sarcasm, she continued on. "I was at the bar and this really drunk guy felt the need to inform me that using condoms is the BEST way to prevent the transferring of sexual diseases."

Chuck opened his mouth to respond but she held a finger to his lips.

"Then, the very kind older lady next to me, (actually I don't really know what a lady of her age was doing here but anyways), she thought that I should not be so wrongly informed and told me that absenance is the ONLY way."

He looked at her confused, "So?"

"So how can one thing be the best way if something else is the only way."

He just gaped at her.

"See that was my reaction. Mind boggling isn't it?"

"You told me this because?"

"Well I wanted someone else to share the burden of having old people telling us what to do with our sex lives. Also I was wondering if there actually was a right answer."

"I don't think there is."

"Yea that's what I figured." She looked around them and noticed they were sitting by themselves. "Chuck why do you have the tendency to sit here by yourself?"

"Well see, Blair and Nathanial are the very perfect example of a couple that makes you gag." He pointed to them and Alex nodded. Observing their sickening sweet glances at each other.

"And Serena is still dancing."

"So dance."

"I was, but my partner abandoned me."

"Well I'm sure she had a good reason." she nodded knowingly.

She ordered a drink and they sat together for awhile. He began playing with her hair, tugging on the ends when she wasn't looking. She tried to be mad but just laughed.

"So how long have you been friends with Nate, Blair and Serena?" Lex asked him breaking their silence.

"Well," he said grabbing some her hair and twirling it around his fingers. "Since forever."

"Any good stories?"

"Yea actually, tons."

"Tell me some." She turned on the couch to face him fully.

"Well this one time…" he began.

Four hours later it was three in the morning and Chuck had basically recited his entire childhood with Nate, Blair and Serena for Alex. The only reasoned he had continued was because she's seemed so interested. Somewhere in the course of his stories he noticed she had switched her drink to water.

"So now you tell me about yourself right?" he asked her, after recounting the time him and Nate had bought three strip clubs in Tahiti.

"Are you insane it's three in the morning. My designated driver and accomplice abandoned me hours ago and I don't know what I would end up telling you. So I feel it's best that I struggle to find my way home and give you a soberly tale of my life some other time."

"So that means you'll agree to be around me another night."

"If I make it home without dying."

"I'll take you home."

"Hunny your about as impaired as I am."

"We'll just have to take my limo then."

A slight grimace fought it's way into her smile. She'd forgot that at the end of their unique conversation he was a rich playboy and she was the entertainment for the night.

"I'll call a cab."

"Nonsense cabbies in this city are not to be trusted. Plus who really wants to drive a drunk girl home at three am."

"You?"

"Precisely. You should take advantage of this opportunity."

She continued to hesitate.

"How about, no matter how much you beg and plead with me I promise not to let you strip off all your clothing and roll around on the floor…or bed. No matter how much black-mail material I could obtain."

"I suppose I can accept your offer. You are such a tactful and polite gentleman after all."

After making their way through the dance floor and out the front door, helping Lex to stay on her feet the entire way, Chuck helped her into the limo and they took off. Lex leaned back on the seat and stared out the window. She watched as they drove by people, buildings and flashing neon. Street lights flicked pass in four second intervals. She tapped on the window to the rhythm of the passing lights, then began to breathe on the window and draw pictures in the fog. Even though she knew from parental lectures that this made the windows horribly dirty with oily fingerprints. As she watched out the window, attempting to remember the New York night scene for inspiration to go out more, Chuck watched her. The way her fingers traced squiggly lines on the window with one hand and tapped a rhythm with the other. She was certainly bewitching the way her hair hung around her face separating them slightly. Sighing she turned her head towards him, surprised by his intense stare.

"hmm?" She inquired quietly.

"You hold my interest is all."

Looking ever so slightly annoyed with his comment she turned her head to stare out the window again.

"What?"

"You've made me an is all."

"Huh?"

"An 'is all' like I have no real worth other than when I amuse you."

"That's not what I meant."

"argh," she grumbled at herself. "Sorry, it's the over sensitive drunk in me." she laughed as she said this.

"Why do girls get emotional when they drink."

"It's like not getting enough sleep."

He looked at her blankly.

"I don't know it's emotions really, just lack of rational thought and perceptive. Like if say you tell a sober girl you think she's cute her thought is probably along the lines of 'cool' but if you tell a drunk girl the same thing she'll be like 'oh my god you're in love with me.' That type of thing I guess… I dunno ask when I'm the sober girl."

Chuck just rolled his eyes. He wanted to laugh but was afraid she might be offended. Fortunately he didn't have to hold it in because she started to giggle then started shaking as she laughed out loud. They laughed together and fell over onto the floor of the limo after a few minutes Lex got a hold of herself and said,

"That guy was soooooo funny."

Chuck stopped laughing, "What guy?"

"The guy jumping up and down and waving his arms at the dog." She began to giggle again. Chuck felt like he was in too much pain to laugh more but couldn't help himself. When they had calmed down for a second time He turned to face her.

"Yes Scarf-Boy?"

"What's your phone number?"

A/N please please review !!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N you know you write for awhile trying to develop a plot for each chapter and the end result is it takes 2 min to read.

I know I forget disclaimers but come on, would anybody think and of the characters from gossip girl are mine?

Sometimes I don't like Titles.

Chuck woke up and showered, thinking about the amazing dream he'd had involving a certain brunette. It was almost twelve, he wondered if it was too early to call and see if she wanted to go to his club tonight She must be in bed with a killer hangover. He smirked, waking her up would be so much fun.

However Lex barely had a headache at all when she woke up. (Thanks to all the water she drank.) After some strawberry yogurt she went to the couch and grabbed a book, figuring that'd she'd read for an hour or so before starting on her painting. She only got to read about twelve words before her phone rang in the other room. Scrambling to get it she expected Alice or Jane to be on the other line but was startled when she found out it was Chuck.

"Hello?"

"Hey babe, did you sleep well?"

"Who's this?"

"It's Chuck doll."

"What's with the odd demeaning speech?"

"Someone's touchy in the morning."

"And other people are just womanizing."

"How's your head?"

"Did I hit it last night?"

"No you just drank a lot."

"I also kept myself hydrated."

"So I was thinking I could show you my club tonight."

"Don't guys have some odd two day call rule?"

"I don't follow rules."

"Your version of badass I assume."

"So what about tonight?"

"I have plans."

"Oh. Doing what?"

"Stuff."

"That's kind of a lame excuse not to see me."

"It's not an excuse. Just because I'm not rich does not mean I have no life."

"Then tell me what you're doing."

"Yes daddy."

"I like it when you call me daddy."

"You've just ruined my idea of a father figure for life."

"Tell me what you're doing."

"What entitles you to a play by play of my life?"

"I'm just curious, stay calm."

"Look how about a rain check? I'd be thrilled to see your club another evening."

"So when are you free?"

"Call me in two days."

"You're funny."

"Chuck I have to go, call me in a couple days though k?"

"Sure, see yah."

"Bye."

Chuck hung up the phone with a louder than necessary click. He had never been turned down before and apparently rejection wasn't his thing. Neither was waiting around, so he got dressed, called Nate and went out to find some amusement for the evening. He was in the mood for blonde.

Lex stared at the phone in annoyance. 'Bloody Pompous Wanker.' She thought to herself. Gives her a ride home, then demands to command her life. How did he manage to be so annoying? Hoping that he wouldn't call her again she mixed her colours and began painting what she remembered of the flashing city lights the night before. Little known to her, not only would he call her again but she'd see him sooner than liked.

"Chuck," a high pitched voice whined in his ear, "I'm boreeeeeeed."

"Then find a way of entertaining yourself." He had definitely picked the wrong blonde.

She pouted.

They were at a night club with Nate and Blair and it was quite boring. Probably because this chick was so easy and had such a low intellect that the lack of challenge had Chuck wishing he would have stayed home. A waitress came to get them fresh drinks, a different one from the last time. He smirked, maybe tonight wouldn't have bin such a waste after all. The mystery girl had black hair streaked with red and had a body that was perfectly generous to her lovely curves. Smiling at Chuck she leaned across the table to pick up his empty glass giving him a generous view of what lay underneath her shirt.

"Chuck I wanna dance." His date was so damn whiny.

"You know what, why don't you go dance with that guy over there. I don't see things working out between us anyways."

Shocked she got up and stormed away. Turning to the waitress Chuck gave her another once over than made a decision.

"When's the end of you shift?"

"Ten minutes."

"Can a buy you a drink."

"I've been here all night, how about we hit a different club?"

"Name the place."

Half an hour later he found himself with a hot girl at a underground punk club. Not exactly where he usually hung out at all but hey, if it gets her in bed he's game. What he wasn't expecting is to see someone he knew there dancing with someone she seemed to be very comfortable with. Chuck immediately began to head for Alex then caught himself, remembering the only relationship they'd had was being drunk together last night. He wasn't in a position to beat up the guy she was flirting with. He started to wonder why he was so angry then blamed it on just being possessive, not exactly something she'd be happy about.

So he sat and brooded at the bar with his own date, barley paying her any attention.

Alex hung out on the floor for another half and hour then moseyed over with her date. She walked up to the bar and stood in front of him, without noticing who stood there. He figured it might be kind of hard since she was so absorbed with this green Mohawk dude. Wondering if she had paid him the same amount of attention the night before he shoved away the pang of jealousy and tapped her on the shoulder.

Turning around she didn't even seemed surprised she even smiled as she introduced him to Simon as her personal stalker.

"So how did a rich boy like you find his way down here?" Simon asked him jokingly.

"Oh you know I just followed her musk." He answered gesturing at Alex.

"Excuse me? Women do not have a musk we have a scent. But really, what are you doing here?"

"I'm on a date."

"Alright dude." Simon chimed in with congratulations.

"So how do you two know each other?" Chuck asked them both.

"Oh man, I met this chick at a music fest last year. She promised to show me around some clubs in New York one day. I'm on tour with my band so I called her up and I was like babe, we have to party."

"The music fest was so much fun. I was going through the crowd and Simon was like you want to go on my shoulders? And of course I had to say yes. Then I spilt my beer on him."

"So after the festival ended we went down to a lake and just hung out for a few days in the sun. There were some awesome musicians hanging on that beach."

"Sounds… delightful." Chuck couldn't understand how that could be fun at all, except for the beer.

"Hey Chuck." his date had shown up beside him. She was well trained.

"Alex, Simon this is uhmmm….. Uhhh."

"Tiffany." she offered.

"Hey I've seen you in here before!" Alex exclaimed.

"Omg! That was just a few weeks ago. Shooters!" Tiffany replied.

"That was so much fun."

Chuck looked at Alex questioningly and Simon seemed to be picturing what could have happened in his head.

"Hey Simon do you mind if I trade you for a dance?"

"Sure dude."

Alex was confused but Tiffany seemed so excited by Simon she went along with it. Out on the floor Chuck leaned in close to her.

"So these were your plans?"

"He's a friend Chuck." She answered annoyed.

"Oh I know."

"And your tone is implying that?"

"You dance rather provocatively with 'friends'." he had a knowing smirk on his face.

"Whatever Chuck."

"Only I hope unlike me this friend is more fortunate and at least gets to score."

She gaped at him, utterly appalled. "Have a nice night." she replied coldly and walked away, out the back door of the club. Unfortunately she didn't notice Chuck following her.

"Hiding in an alley? Very classy. And of course very safe."

"Go away Chuck."

"But I thought I was Scarf-Boy. Side-kick extraordinaire!" he taunted her.

"Leave me alone."

"So your all confident until somebody wants something in return for their efforts."

"You gave me a ride home. Thank-you."

"Don't you wish you could thank me for more?"

"What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing."

"You think you just have the right to ruin my night, then follow me into an alley way and demand sex?"

"At what point did I have such an effect on your night? When I walked in?"

"No."

"When I told you I had a date."

"She's a nice girl. I think I might warn her about your idiocy."

"When I stole you from your date?"

"He's a friend from a summer. And didn't I just say it's not a date?"

"When I suggested your legs spread like butter for dudes with mowhawks?"

"I should have broke your nose."

"Awe come on babe, you can't take a boy seriously."

"Don't joke about serious things."

"How about I buy you a drink to make up for it?"

"I'd hate to comply with what you consider as payment."

Chuck sighed, he had definitely made a mistake, and he found he didn't like that he wouldn't see her again.

"Look I made a mistake. I guess I'm just used to getting what I want."

"Don't put me on your Christmas list."

Alex made to walk past him back into the club but he grabbed her arm to stop her.

"Alex?"

"Yes?"

"Forgive me?"

She sighed, "Maybe." When she pulled her arm away he let go, she went back inside and he wondered if he'd let her go out of his life.

When he headed back inside he found Tiffany still dancing with Simon but Alex was nowhere to be seen.

"Dude," Simon started, "What'd you do?"

A/N I refuse to write if you refuse to review.


	6. hah, alternative lifestyles

A/N sorry about the lack of updating but sometimes I just don't have computer access. Also I don't think I've made Chuck mean enough and I couldn't think of anything to stall the plot so everyone give a big hand to Julia and her huge contributions to this chapter. No really she probably wrote more than half of it and her speedy hands helped to type it out. CLAP FOR HER!! Also, thanks for all the super reviews you gave. They fill my life with joy, wonder and bloodlust!

Hah, alternative lifestyle.

It'd been two days since he saw her last and he wondered if it was too early to call, but what would she think if he didn't call

Desperation _no_ he corrected himself, _persistence _of course he wasn't desperate of course! He wanted her and not giving up, not letting her go… well that simply means he has determination. Not desperation _no_ Chuck was never desperate. With a _determined _look he dialled her number in yet another attempt.

Alex laid in the sun in the middle of central park. She was having a picnic with Alice and Jane and thoroughly enjoying it. Completely relaxed… then her phone rang and Chucks name was on the display, again.

"Hello?"

"Hey it's Chuck."

"And?"

"Well, how are you?"

"Fine."

"That's good." His voice sounded gruff and raw.

"Do you have a cold or something?"

"No." He coughed to clear his throat. "I'm fine, I was wondering if I could take you out sometime soon?"

"I don't know Chuck, we don't really share ethics."

"Alex please I'm practically on my knees here!"

Alex didn't reply, unsure if this was just a means to his twisted end.

"I'll even go shopping."

"Oh, god no! I hate malls."

"I'll do anything."

"Anything?" This was too easy, "My friends and I were having a little party…"

Chuck grinned, "Oh yea? Where about?"

"The zoo."

"What?" He blinked slowly.

"Oh what's the matter? Come on it'll be fun!" Her voice grew chipper, "There'll be llamas, alpacas, pigs, goats, smelly goats, chickens, dogs, cows-"

"Dogs?"

"-pigeons, ponies, emus, giraffes-"

"Bu-wha-"

"Babe!" She shouted as the possibility of pure joy dawned on her.

"That's-"

"Babe!"

"-A pig"

"Babe! See yah tomorrow!" _click_

Chuck was horrified. "wh-bu-uh…"

She had hung up over a minute ago and he was still stuttering. He then decided he was in great need of a few drinks.

"There's a party at the zoo?" Alice asked.

"Of course not."

"Then why'd you… your evil."

"Hail the genius one!" Jane chanted mock bowing.

"He shouldn't have said anything."

"I'll be surprised if he shows up. Or talks to you again afterwards."

"That's what I'm hoping for."

Chuck paced his bedroom floor. Had he just agreed to go to the zoo? A New York elite hanging out with smelly goats for the day? He considered calling Nate but knew he'd make fun of him. Which reminded him he had lunch plans with Nate and Blair tomorrow afternoon. Instead of calling Nate, who would demand he reschedule with Alex he called Blair, she would be happy for some alone time with Nate.

"Hello?"

"Hello Blair, How are you?"

"I'm fine and you?"

"I have to cancel on tomorrow."

"Oh why?" She sounded shocked, Chuck rarely cancelled on her and Nate.

"I kind of forgot about lunch and made plans with Alex."

"Oh, I'd say just bring her to lunch but she probably wouldn't fit in, fashion wise."

"Come, come now Blair darling, don't be so cruel."

"I'd just wish you'd fuck her already, then she wouldn't have to hang around and you wouldn't be wasting your time."

"Maybe I'll keep her around just to bug you."

"And maybe I'll tell the whole school that's it's taken you over a week to bed a middle class hippy."

"Fine I'll see you guys tomorrow night."

Chuck stood outside zoo, it was 1:15. She was late and people stared at him as they walked by.

"Hi chuck!" She yelled at him enthusiastically, "Ready to meet the smelly goats?"

Chucked stared at her, Alex had become a red head.

"You dyed your hair?"

"No it magically changes colour on its own." She grabbed his arm,

"Come on I wanna see Babe!"

"That's a pig."

"Babe!"

"Okay."

They paid, got a stamp, of an elephant and entered the zoo. Alex grabbed Chucks hand and ran towards a stand selling straw hats. Buying one she placed it on her head and struck a pose.

"Please don't." Chuck begged her.

"I like it."

"Please take it off."

"Okay." She took off the hat and shoved it onto his head. "If you take that off I will never speak to you again."

Chuck looked very sad.

She grabbed his arm again and went running down a pathway, dragging him along. Poor Chuck so helpless.

"Alex where are we-"

But he was cut off as she screamed, "GOATS!" she pointed and laughed and ran up to the fence. He stared at her while she stared at the goats. She was lost in her admiration and had the cutest smile on her face.

"Aren't they cute?" she asked him?

"Don't they smell?"

"Yep!" A goat came trouncing up to the fence and she reached out a hand to stroke it's neck.

"Nice goaty." She cooed.

The nice goaty snapped the hat off Chucks head, ran to the top of a small hill and then _munch, munch, munch. _

Chuck's jaw gaped open and Alex looked like she was about to cry. One of the zoo keepers wandered over. "You know I keep telling them to put up a sign."

Alex and Chuck stared at him, then Alex began to walk back up the path and Chuck followed her.

"Uhh- Alex are you okay?" he asked her.

"I want to see the giraffes now!"

"Hey… Wait. I thought this was a party!"

"Oh. Yes." A pause. "I lied."

"Why?"

"Well, I wanted to come to the zoo." She grinned. "Let's go on the train… thing. What is it called?"

"Train tour. Why the zoo?"

"You said _anything_," she reminded him. She started walking back to the zoo entrance, where a ridiculously bright sign announced the beginning of the train tour.

They hopped on the train, taking their seats at the caboose. Chuck wrapped his arm around Alex, but the girl ignored him for a legitimate reason: they were passing the elephants.

"You know… Most people don't go to the zoo for a date," Chuck muttered, feeling a little spiteful.

"Nothing is keeping you here," Alex replied. That stung. Her next comment was worse. "If it's so painful, to be here, go hang out in a club with your friends."

"That's not what I meant. The zoo is not my usual haunt, I'll admit, but it doesn't mean I won't ever come here if some cute girl asks me to."

Alex smiled. "You're silly." Then she continued looking at the giraffes, admiring the oddity of it all. "Did you know that when a giraffe is born, it's welcoming into the world is a nine foot drop on it's head?"

"Poor giraffe babies," he responded with a very serious and grave expression on his face. This made her laugh, although it was a very serious matter. Nine feet. Not fun.

"See, zoos are full of useless information. Also, bugs. They like the tourists."

"Can I take you to a boring club tonight?" Chuck asked her, swatting a fly away from his eye sockets.

"See, the fly is attracted to your eyes, due to all the water there. They want to drink it and lay their eggs on the damp surface."

Chuck found this quite irrelevant. "What about tonight?"

"I'll have to think about it."

Hmph. "Fine."

They continued the rest of the tour in silence, with the odd exclamation from Alex ("Look at that bird! It's a bird, you know."), which Chuck could not help but laugh at. Alex dragged him around the rest of the day.

They finished the evening at the reptile house with Alex running screaming from the building when Chuck tried to put a spider on her. He found her outside sitting on a bench with a purple popsicle, holding out another one for him.

"Do you honestly need more sugar?" he asked as he sat beside her.

"My caffeine is dwindling." she responded licking her popsicle. "I think we've seen everything what do you want to do now?"

"Well I wanted to show you this awesome club but it's a bit early for that. How about dinner?"

"I don't know." She said looking down at her red chequered shirt and washed out jeans. "I'd have to change first."

"We could just go to my place, you don't have to wear anything there."

"You know I think I might just spend the night at my house, alone."

"Come on it was a joke, I'll take you home and you can change. Can I watch?"

"CHUCK!"

"Can't blame a guy for an attempt."

They got into Chuck's limo a few minutes later. He slid over closer to her. She stared out the window. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. Her hand reached down sneakily into her bag. Cupping her face in his hand he turned his face towards his. Her eyes closed slowly and his too as he slowly leaned in. Chuck smile as his lips connected with… a piece of laminated paper.

"What the hell?" he asked pulling away quickly. He found himself staring at a picture of a goat.

"Hah you kissed a smelly goat. I knew your being a player was just a cover."

"What?"

"Hah bestiality."

"No. Alex yo-"

"Hah alternative lifestyle."

A/N Little less serious than last chapter. I think. Anyways hope you like it and PLEASE REVIEW!!

Might not update for a few days. So don't be super expectant.


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